I'm with one of my best friends at the apartment. Both of us like synchronized by sadistic coincidence, just got lied and deceived by cowards. For me its more like a process: he taught me all what I should avoid from a man in life; he showed me how does a selfish person looks like. So I'm glad.
For my friend he is only able to see 2 things: the deceive and how much he will miss all the good things he has with him. So, he constantly cries and I have to be his strong shoulder, his word of wisdom and love.
Now, we have, well I have 2 problems here: I will have to leave him alone again soon and I wonder what is wrong with me? Why am I not crying or missing this guy I dated for almost 2 months and counting?
For problem 1. there is not much to do: I'll do my best while I'm here. Try to transmit him all the hope I can and the love he needs while I'm here, but then it will be me off to London.
About number 2, I just realised I already cried all I had to. I cried for the time I wasted but crying over wasted time is a vicious circle. I can't do that to myself. The other thing I realised about why I can't cry is because I had nothing. In past relationships I've had something to grieve about, but not this time. He never opened, he never gave me the chance to build up anything. Every time we had a nice foundation he immediately torn it apart. My friend is luckier somehow: he has something real to cry for.
For my friend he is only able to see 2 things: the deceive and how much he will miss all the good things he has with him. So, he constantly cries and I have to be his strong shoulder, his word of wisdom and love.
Now, we have, well I have 2 problems here: I will have to leave him alone again soon and I wonder what is wrong with me? Why am I not crying or missing this guy I dated for almost 2 months and counting?
For problem 1. there is not much to do: I'll do my best while I'm here. Try to transmit him all the hope I can and the love he needs while I'm here, but then it will be me off to London.
About number 2, I just realised I already cried all I had to. I cried for the time I wasted but crying over wasted time is a vicious circle. I can't do that to myself. The other thing I realised about why I can't cry is because I had nothing. In past relationships I've had something to grieve about, but not this time. He never opened, he never gave me the chance to build up anything. Every time we had a nice foundation he immediately torn it apart. My friend is luckier somehow: he has something real to cry for.
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